zeldathemes
i din't eat the cookies, I swear..

What's up guys
I am 16 years old and I run a humour blog.
This is all the running I do.
Hopefully i will satisfy all your humorous needs, feel free to ask me anything appropriate.

perfect-unison:

rhrealitycheck:

feministbecky:

peroquevaina:

(I like that this has no gender pronouns, too.)

I like that the person asking for sex isn’t pissed off.

This is great.

this is 100 fucking percent how it should be

ohhmyepicfail:

Visit us on Rock-Quotes!

ohhmyepicfail:

Visit us on Rock-Quotes!

vatican-cameos-sweetie:

piratesofthecaribbean:

Fun fact: This is Orlando’s legit impression of Johnny; it wasn’t originally scripted.

Was there even a script for this film. Every time I see a post about PotC they are like ‘this wasn’t scripted’

vatican-cameos-sweetie:

piratesofthecaribbean:

Fun fact: This is Orlando’s legit impression of Johnny; it wasn’t originally scripted.

Was there even a script for this film. Every time I see a post about PotC they are like ‘this wasn’t scripted’

westbor0baptistchurch:

Sabrina the Teenage Bitch

roseisreturning:

mermaids don’t have thigh gaps but they can still lure men to their deaths

intensional:

me

intensional:

me

perchu:

a-keldama:

perchu:

eating in class when ur not supposed to

image

I do this every day in fifth period.
You wanna know what I eat?
Moreos.

I have a new idea for things you can do during fifth period:

  • shove a cactus up your ass

arcticmonkies:

Do my dark undereye circles and unwashed hair turn you on

smooth ass way to get a date 

barebackinq:

Friend: Ill be there in 5 minutes are you ready?

Me:

image

karenhealey:

kastiakbc:

princehal9000:

winstons-and-enochs:

the guardian imagines what historical figures might look like today. my personal favourite is shakespeare, reincarnated as a shoreditch hipster.

but can you imagine how’d he’d sound a loft party? 
"I’m going to subvert the whole, like, narrative ideal by telling you upfront that these two, like, teenagers are going to fall in love and die, and then do it. So there’s no more hiding in the words. Stark, yeah? And then, I think I’ll hide a sonnet in their big scene together, right? It’ll be subversive, because only, you know, people who are up on sonnets will get it…..what? No, she’s thirteen—a little edgy but that’s art, man. Art.”

i am loving hipster shakespeare A++

This explains so much. Hipster Shakespeare drank too many experimental microbrews one night:"Will, we need this bit done, buddy. We’ve got rehearsal in ten minutes.""Shit, I dunno. Uh. Exit.""Just… "Exit"?""Exit, pursued by a bear.""Will, come on.""I think I left my LUNGS in that bucket, Robbie, okay? Exit, pursued by a bear. It’s surrealism. Man versus wild. Whatever. Get me a Gatorade and a shit ton of Advil, and maybe I can work out what I’m going to do with the statue."

karenhealey:

kastiakbc:

princehal9000:

winstons-and-enochs:

the guardian imagines what historical figures might look like today. my personal favourite is shakespeare, reincarnated as a shoreditch hipster.

but can you imagine how’d he’d sound a loft party? 

"I’m going to subvert the whole, like, narrative ideal by telling you upfront that these two, like, teenagers are going to fall in love and die, and then do it. So there’s no more hiding in the words. Stark, yeah? And then, I think I’ll hide a sonnet in their big scene together, right? It’ll be subversive, because only, you know, people who are up on sonnets will get it…..what? No, she’s thirteen—a little edgy but that’s art, man. Art.”

i am loving hipster shakespeare
A++

This explains so much. Hipster Shakespeare drank too many experimental microbrews one night:

"Will, we need this bit done, buddy. We’ve got rehearsal in ten minutes."

"Shit, I dunno. Uh. Exit."

"Just… "Exit"?"

"Exit, pursued by a bear."

"Will, come on."

"I think I left my LUNGS in that bucket, Robbie, okay? Exit, pursued by a bear. It’s surrealism. Man versus wild. Whatever. Get me a Gatorade and a shit ton of Advil, and maybe I can work out what I’m going to do with the statue."